What can we do instead of comparing ourselves to others?
I've written about the danger of getting caught up in the comparison trap before because I think it is so easy to do. It's part of our human nature, so oftentimes, comparing happens subconsciously. We can walk away from an interaction, a social media post, a book we've read, etc. with a sense of superiority, inferiority, or maybe a mixture of both depending on who or what we are comparing ourselves to. I confess I am more prone to feeling inferior and wrestling with feeling like I don't measure up, but what if Instead of comparing ourselves, our talents, homes, families, jobs, etc. to others, we began to celebrate and encourage each other?
Today, I would like to share with you four rhythms the Lord recently impressed on my heart to practice when I am tempted to compare.
Focus on Jesus
"We are naturally prone to worshipping ourselves. Our hearts are idol factories that look for any opportunity to exalt fame, fortune, self-image, success, or influence to the throne of our hearts. You've probably experienced this. How many times have you wrestled with self-worth, self-image, self-pity, self-doubt, or self-fulfillment after time spent on social media platforms?" (Ruth Chou Simons)
This type of thinking has exposed itself in my heart at times. I find it happens when I am more focused on myself or what others are accomplishing, rather than intentionally filling my heart and mind, first and foremost, with Jesus and His matchless beauty. Do you know what happens when we fix our hearts and minds on Jesus? Our perspective changes. We see with clarity. The Holy Spirit works to produce good fruit, love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, and self-control, in our lives. He reminds us of our identity in Christ and the worth of all God's image-bearers. As we focus on Jesus, our desire to glorify Him increases, and our love for Him and others expands and eventually replaces the imagined need to preserve our self-image.
Remember who deserves all the glory
We were created to glorify God. Anything we create, accomplish, and achieve is meant to point people toward the Creator of Heaven and Earth; toward the One from whom our abilities originate. Life is not a competition between God's image-bearers, especially in the body of Christ. God has given all of us talents that He intends for us to use to make His Kingdom winsome, especially to those who do not know and believe in Him. He has given us gifts to use to encourage and love one another so that His name would be glorified throughout all the earth, and so the world would know we belong to Him.
Remember your true identity
Through faith in Jesus, I am a daughter of God. This is significant because I am fully and perfectly loved, always, and you are too. God has created good works for His children to complete and He has infused our lives with purpose. He is our portion and we lack nothing in Him. In God's Kingdom, we all matter. Our identities are not anchored in anything other than Jesus, and since this is true, when we see what others are accomplishing we can cast our feelings of insignificance onto Jesus and allow Him to shape our view of ourselves and others. Other people's positions and purposes don't negate the importance of any other part of the body of Christ. In fact, God is the One who arranges the members of the body of Christ as He sees fit, and has declared that no part of the body of Christ can say to another part, "I have no need of you." We have been commissioned to build each other up, celebrate God's work in each other's lives, and together, bring glory to His great name. (1Corinthians 12:12-31)
Pray for others
As I was thinking through these four rhythms, this one convicted me the most. What would happen if we spent time praying for people rather than comparing ourselves to them or believing the lie that the work we are doing for God's Kingdom is insignificant or superior to their work? What would happen if we spent time praying for others to succeed in the work God has given them to do, rather than feeling and acting like we are competing with them, or "our" ministries, "our" church families, etc. are competing with theirs? What if we sought out opportunities to encourage and cheer others forward?
What if we all did this?!
The Bible tells us that people will know we belong to God by how we love each other, and Romans 12:9-10 states, "Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other."
One significant way we can genuinely love others and honor them is by praying for them.
The Apostle Paul was an excellent example of this!
Colossians 1:3-12 (See Colossians 1:1-12 for Paul's entire prayer for the Colossian church)
"We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you...
Of this, you have heard before in the word of the truth, the gospel, which has come to you, as indeed in the whole world it is bearing fruit and increasing—as it also does among you since the day you heard it and understood the grace of God in truth...we have not ceased to pray for you,
asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him: bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; being strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy;
giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins."
There is a lot to glean in just these few scriptures!
First, I see that Paul and Timothy always thanked God for their brothers and sisters in Christ. They recognized and openly acknowledged that the Christians in Colosse were bearing fruit, and were fellow recipients of God's grace. The same grace that was sustaining, strengthening, and helping Paul and Timothy to flourish.
Next, I notice the language Paul and Timothy used when praying for the Christians in Colosse: filled with the knowledge of God's will, fully pleasing to Him, bearing fruit, every good work, increasing in the knowledge of God, strengthened with God's power for endurance and patience with joy. They truly desired to see the Christians in Colosse grow, bloom, and blossom in Christ.
Lastly, I observe that Paul and Timothy reinforced the truth that the Colossians were qualified by God. They acknowledged the fact that the Colossians were rescued through the work of Jesus and brought into the Kingdom of God just as they were. They reminded themselves and the Colossians that they were all recipients of the same redemption, forgiveness, and eternal inheritance. In other words, they were on the same team and part of the same family.
I believe one of the reasons Paul and TImothy's prayer is recorded in scripture is so we would be encouraged to pray for others this way. By God's grace, we can thank God for our brothers and sisters in Christ, we can sincerely seek that they would grow, bloom, and blossom in their knowledge of God, His will for them, and the work God has for them to do, and we can celebrate their growth and accomplishments. We can confess our tendency to compare and compete and remind ourselves that we are part of the same family designed to give glory to God. We can remind ourselves that God "makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love." (Ephesians 4:1-16)
Don't miss this: As we do the special work God gives us to do, we help each other grow! I don't know about you, but I find this very encouraging and exciting! We can specifically impact the growth of God's Kingdom here on earth by being followers of Jesus who help others grow.
How? It's a combination of being invested in the work God has specifically given us to do and praying for others to succeed in the work God has given them to do.
So I want to encourage all of us to take an honest look at our hearts. Do we often get caught in the comparison trap or feel like all of life is a competition? If so, let's turn to Jesus and ask for His grace to choose these four rhythms instead:
Focus on Jesus
Remember who deserves all the glory
Remember your true identity &
Pray for others
Sincerely,
Amy
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